Let’s Talk Bookish is a weekly bookish meme where participants discuss certain topics, share their opinions, and spread the love by visiting each other’s posts. Originally created and hosted by Rukky @ Eternity Books, it’s now hosted by Aria @ Book Nook Bits.
This week’s topic is:
Should all Romances have Happily-Ever-Afters (HEAs)?
(submitted by Me!)
Prompts: Do you like romances with happy endings? Do you think that all romances should have happy endings? Why or why not? What are some of your favorite romances with Happily Ever Afters?
The spark
In late 2021, I read and reviewed a book that sparked a healthy discussion in the comments about whether or not books without an HEA or Happily-Ever-After should be labeled “romance”. Don’t worry, I wont say which book to avoid spoilers, but if you’re a follower, you might know the book I’m talking about. I was super intrigued by this discussion and quickly started writing a post with my thoughts, but I never shared it. So instead I suggested it as a prompt for Let’s Talk Bookish. I apologize for the length of this post. I had a lot of thoughts!
Let me preface this by saying these are just my opinions. There are no right or wrong answers here. This is just “food for thought.” I love a healthy discussion! It’s one of the many reasons I started blogging. I’m also open-minded, so you might be able to change my mind by offering alternative suggestions.
Labels
This is probably a topic that’s been around for ages, but as I’m somewhat newer to blogging, it’s a new topic for me. It’s clearly not something I’ve thought too seriously about before because I was surprised by the angry reviewers on Goodreads who felt mislead by the book, giving it only 1 or 2 stars. I can easily think of several books labeled as “romance” that didn’t have neat and tidy HEAs. As well as films labeled as “romance” or “rom-coms”. And I think “romance” may be too broad of a term, but I’m not sure what’s better.
Sometimes “women’s fiction” is used as an alternative to “romance” books, but it has its own set of problems. It seems too broad, as well, especially when a book IS primarily a romance but just doesn’t have an HEA ending. But more importantly it seems sexist to me. There isn’t a “men’s fiction” genre. Calling books “women’s fiction” can be misleading, suggesting a book is for women only, not necessarily written by or featuring women. Personally, I think “literary fiction” is a much better term for those more serious books where romance is a sub-plot.
Don’t be a spoiler!
But back to the main issue for me, it all boils down to spoilers. I think I’m in the rare group of people who DON’T want to necessarily know they’re reading an HEA. I like to be surprised. However, I’m also not an overly emotional reader, so I’m probably not as easily affected when things aren’t tied up nicely at the end. I can understand those readers who ARE more emotional readers or those who want to avoid triggers. But, I can sympathize a bit with the author and publishers wanting to market a book a romance when it reads like a romance for the majority of the book but simply doesn’t wrap up with the main characters together at the end.
Please don’t roast me in the comments. Ha!
And just to further play devil’s advocate and dig my own grave… I could easily take a deep dive here into what does Happily-Ever-After really mean? Just because two main characters don’t end up together at the end, does that mean they’re not happy? Do we really need a character to end up with someone at the end of a book to be a well-rounded human? Can the book not be filled with romance and then for whatever reason, the characters don’t end up together? I think if we limit ourselves to books that only end with our main characters happily together, we may miss out on some beautiful and emotional love stories. And this is coming from a self-described “hopeless romantic”. But, yes, I do prefer the bulk of my romances to have nice, tidy endings, I just don’t require it.
It’s a love story… (sing with me!) Baby, just say yes!
Let’s take, for example, the book and film adaptation Love Story by Erich Segal, written in 1970. (I have not read the book, but I have seen the film.) I’m hoping this one is old enough it won’t lead to spoilers for anyone… It’s an opposites attract story about two college students who fall deeply in love but don’t end up together in the end. Which is pretty much the plot of the story, so it really shouldn’t be a spoiler. This story is romantic and, I feel, belongs in the romance genre. (Yes, I can hear those of you shouting at me that it’s a tragedy, but I think it’s a romance first.) I wonder if when it originally published, anyone batted an eye at the fact it was labeled a “romance”. Does this mean our definition of the genre has changed more recently?
When I was a kid, my mother read romance novels. Back in the day, that meant a paperback with a scantily clad, swoon-y couple on the cover. Think Fabio. It was more clear-cut. Now we have cute illustrated covers (which I love!), as well as the more traditional “romance” book covers. I think this distinction definitely adds to the confusion. Readers see an illustrated cover and maybe assume the book will be a lighter read. I try to resist assuming anything when it comes to books. I guess the old adage, “don’t judge a book by its cover” is especially important under these circumstances.
And I do love romances that are lighter—even “too good to be true” ones—as long as they are well-written. I’m thinking of Christina Lauren’s books, like The Unhoneymooners or The Soulmate Equation. Many situations in those books are not realistically plausible, but the books are fun and well-executed. But for a more serious book, I want it to reflect real life, which doesn’t always mean an HEA to me.
So what’s the solution?
It’s really not fair to have a category labeled HEA for those readers who don’t want to be spoiled. But it’s also not fair to surprise those readers who want to know the book they’re reading will end by their definition: happily. There are those rare times when I know I can’t handle an ambivalent ending. The best solution I’ve found for now—until the book world comes up with a better one—is to simply do some research. If I read a synopsis and think it’s not clear whether it’s an HEA, but that’s what I need at the moment, I’ll skim some reviews and see what others are saying. If it’s an ARC (advanced readers copy) without many reviews, I’ll put it off for another day, pass on it, or maybe I could contact the publisher or author. If you have a technique that works for you, please share it with us! But for the time being, I’ll continue to label a book that is primarily focused on romance a “romance”. With or without an HEA. So be forewarned!
And that book that sparked this discussion?? I joined a zoom call discussion with the European author early in the year and I posted the question of whether she thought her book should be labeled a “romance”. She said she was aware of the debate, but that it seemed to only be Americans who had an issue with labeling the book a “romance”. She said personally she labels it a “romance”, but she quickly added that she probably wasn’t the best person to ask.
Let’s Discuss!
What’s your opinion? Should a romance always have a happy ending? What should a book that is primarily a romance be called if it doesn’t have an HEA? Let me know in the comments!
Okay. I have big opinions on this. You have a lot of different thoughts here on what I actually think are a few different topics. I’ll start with HEAS. I know Romance is a large genre. There are many subgenres within in it. Romances can be light, dark, or anywhere in between. They can be emotional, funny, and again everywhere in between. The thing that makes a book categorically a Romance IS an HEA or an HFN. Without either of those, a book is NOT a Romance novel. Doesn’t matter if there is a love story within the book, it’s not a Romance without the HEA or HFN. It is not a spoiler for a Romance novel to have an HEA. It’s what defines the genre. People who are specifically picking up a Romance novel are looking for a happy ending for the couple. They expect that and are going to be extremely mad if there isn’t one when they get to the end of a book. I would be furious.
But what about those books that that heavily feature a love story but end in tragedy or without the couple together? They can be love stories, but they are not Romance novels. They are Fiction with a love story or Women’s Fiction that has a love story. Or they could be Science Fiction or Fantasy with a love story. Or Thrillers with a love story. Or Horror with a love story. I guess what I’m saying is that books that are not Romance novels can have a love story, but they cannot be categorized specifically as a Romance without that HEA. I’ve read several love stories that were not Romances over the years and knowing they were not Romances did not spoil anything for me. In fact, it gave me the right frame of mind and expectations going into the books.
Your deep dive into what is an HEA brings my point back around. An HEA/HFN in Romance is the couple ending up together at the end. It’s the Disney Princess type HEA. That’s what helps distinguish a Romance novel for readers. It’s that simple. In other genres, an HEA can mean pretty much anything and can be explored — with or without a love story.
I do agree that covers have maybe made this topic messier maybe. Pretty much every genre has illustrated covers at this point. You can’t depend on a cover to tell you the type of book any longer. Romance covers have evolved from those Fabio covers you mentioned to a bunch of different styles. One used to be able to simply look at a cover and say, “That’s a Romance novel” and the HEA was guaranteed. A lot of that has to do with publishers and the way they are trying to market books these days with social media. Some Romance readers want to feel more comfortable in reading in public, so there’s discreet covers or illustrated covers/versions. Some publishers are even mislabeling books. I can’t tell you the number of times I’ve read a “rom-com” that was a rom-com based on the way the book was marketed. (It made me mad.) I guess what I’m saying is that we have to take covers out of the conversation now when it comes to labeling book genres. They overlap so much that it’s no longer a descriptor for what kind of book someone wants to read. (That could also be why it is even more important to Romance readers for people to understand that it’s an HEA/HFN that defines the genre.)
Anyways. I hope this didn’t come across as attacking you or anything. That wasn’t my point. I just wanted to explain, as a romance reader, why the HEA/HFN is the distinction in the romance genre and why labeling all love stories as romances can actually hurt readers and the genre.
I hear you! And no, I don’t feel attacked. I invited this discussion, so no worries. 😊 I know I’m in the minority, and I can totally understand what you’re saying… I just still disagree. The book I read read like a rom-com, it read like a romance, up until the very end. I just don’t think the ending should disqualify it as a romance. BUT I know I’m pretty alone with this opinion. I’m just curious if I’m completely alone! Haha!
What do you think about the author saying she considers it a romance and that it only seems to be Americans who have such a strict view of romances and HEAs? Maybe we’re just predisposed for a Disney ending?? And do you think authors should have a say in what genre their books belong or just the publisher? (That’s probably a whole other discussion. Ha!)
I do agree with you that we can’t really consider covers when labeling books, but I know it does add to the confusion for many.
I know there’s no solution and readers will probably never agree, I mostly just get sad when a great book is bashed because of it. But thank you for discussing it with me and sharing your thoughts! <3
I think I would have to ask the author if the book they wrote was primarily focused on the relationship and romantic love between the people? Was the ending emotionally satisfying and optimistic for the relationship and the reader?
I don’t really want to get into the publisher/author thing about who gets to decide.
That makes sense! But if I apply what you said to the book I’m using here, the answers are yes. Except that the main characters are not in a relationship at the end. The entirety of the book is primarily focused on the relationship and romantic love, the ending is emotionally satisfying (at least to me), and the ending is optimistic for the main character, with even a prospective new love interest. Which is why I find it so hard not to categorize it as a romance. The book is definitely an anomaly, but there are others out there.
It’s the “except” that keeps it from being a romance. If the characters are not in a relationship in the end, there is not an HEA for the relationship and therefore it’s not a romance. To me, it’s that simple.
What you’re describing here to me is fiction (or women’s fiction) with a love story. There’s no HEA for the original couple. At the end, they’re finished and move on. They’ve been on some journey where they’ve learned something about themselves or something and they may have found new love, but since that original relationship is not still intact it’s not a romance. Books can be/have love stories without being Romances. I think that is what people have a hard time grasping. A couple of examples are Colleen Hoover’s It Ends With Us or Bright Side by Kim Holden. Both are love stories, but they are not romances.
I completely get what you’re saying, but I just don’t agree. Both of those books you mentioned are marked as Romances as their top category on Goodreads. So maybe I’m not as alone in my opinion as I thought.😃 For me if a book is mostly romantic in nature, it’s a romance, which seems simple to me. But I will definitely think twice before I label books and probably be clearer in my reviews when the books fall in the gray area. Thank you for debating with me, Deanna!
You don’t have to agree with me. I do think we have to take GR categories with a grain of salt. They’re not perfect. I marked “romance” on It Ends With Us along with fiction, women’s fiction, etc because there is a romance in it. I guess I should change that language to “love story” instead because maybe it is misleading. Plus, there are a ton of people on Tiktok that romanticize that relationship and want a book for that guy when he should probably be in jail. That book is about an abusive relationship and it not a romance. If we call if a romance, we’re romanticizing abuse. It’s women’s fiction with a toxic love story. I would just say think of the books you read with romantic relationships in them as love stories until they get a HEA for the couple. Then they can be a romance novel. Otherwise, they’re fiction with a love story.
I should have clarified that I have NOT read either of those books! It definitely doesn’t sound like it should be labeled a romance. But I’m liking what you said about love stories. That’s a nice way to think of it! But… I still think the book I’m talking about belongs in the Romance genre. 😉
Oops! Sorry to spoil that one for you! Shame on me!
Haha, it’s ok! I knew it was a dark one.
And thanks for the conversation! It’s always nice to have discussions!
Yes!!
I agree, if it’s labeled as Romance (by the publisher) it needs to have an HEA or HFN. And I think that romance readers expect that. It’s not about how it ends, it’s all about the story and HOW the couple overcome their obstacles to get to the HEA or HFN. If it ends in tragedy, it’s something else. It would be like labeling a book horror, and have nothing bad or scary happen in the story. Nice topic today!
This is exactly it!
Sooo, you’re saying you agree with Deanna’s comments? Because I was saying I don’t think a Romance has to have an HEA or HFN to be in the Romance genre. 😃 Using your horror example, what if the book is full of romance and reads like a rom-com, but the couple just don’t end up together? You still wouldn’t call it a romance? The book that inspired this topic wasn’t sad until towards the end, it was funny, cute, all the things that make a romance. And even though the couple didn’t end up together, it still ended hopeful. I would still place it in the romance genre because it didn’t seem to belong anywhere else. I hope that makes sense! I’m loving the discussion. And learning that I’m very much in the minority. Haha!
I think I agree with you! Which is, of course, unpopular, but you are not alone at least 😂 So look. Not all romances have happy endings, right? (I’d actually venture to say that NONE do since someone dies first, but that took a really depressing turn, so I’ll get back to the topic at hand!) I think if the focus of the book is on the romance, then it’s romance. How it ends doesn’t really matter if the book is about the romance- the book isn’t being advertised as a Forever Romance, just Romance. And look- I also like when the book has an HEA, I get rather stabby at open/depressing endings but… sometimes they’re necessary? To be fair, I think that if an author writes a bunch of downer romances, no one is going to want to read that author’s books in the future. But I also think that throwing in a romance that maybe doesn’t get that perfect ending can mix up the genre a little too, keep it from being *too* predictable and stagnant, and like you said, offers the lesson that maybe people don’t *need* to be coupled for the ending to be happy! This is such a thoughtful discussion, thanks for sharing it!
Ohmygosh I’m so happy to see your comment! I was really feeling like I was all alone over here. 😂 I 100% agree with everything you said. Especially the part about it mixing up the genre. Maybe that’s what I really don’t like: when things are too predictable. I knew there were strong opinions about this topic and I’m enjoying hearing everyone’s different points of view!
I don’t use the term “women’s fiction” unless pushed. You will see I list such books as “fiction” (let’s be honest, mine are usually contemporary fiction). I think I know what book you are talking about, but for me, my romances require an HEA and for the romance to be the most central focus of the story. I subscribe to the idea Deanna talked about – there are romances and love stories which are different. A book can be a love story (like the book bearing its name) without being considered a genre romance. I know when I tag books on Goodreads, if there is a romantic subplot, I will often tag it romance, but it may not be a genre romance. I do that for when people ask for stories without romance (some people like no romance in their books). I think sometimes readers will automatically denote a book as a romance because the author is so closely associated with the genre. Like Hoover. She has written many genre romance books, but not all her books fall into that category. I pick up something labeled a romance expecting that HEA/HFN. If it’s not there, I will not be happy.
I do like the term ‘contemporary fiction’ but once again, it’s so very general, encompassing so many sub-genres. I guess what I’m learning about myself is that I know most readers assume a book categorized under Romance expect an HEA or HFN, I just don’t LIKE that it’s assumed. Haha! I agree with what Shannon said above: If the focus of a book is romance, then it’s a romance. No matter how it ends. But I totally understand why others disagree. And yes the Goodreads tags are an imperfect system, but I do think it shows what the majority of readers label books as. Others have used Horror and Mystery as examples, but if a book only had a small mystery as a subplot or a touch of horror elements, I wouldn’t label it Horror or Mystery. Same if it only had a small amount of romance. But if the majority of the book is romance, I call it a Romance. So I guess it comes down to that for me. 🙂
In all fairness, you create your own shelves for yourself on GR, and I know my shelves are for me to remember things.
Absolutely! But if a book just has a very small sub-plot of romance, I wouldn’t label it a romance on Goodreads. I usually only tag the major themes. But I know I could be in the minority on that, as well.
It can be what one doesn’t consider genre romance, and still have a sizable romantic subplot. A majority of “women’s” fiction and YA books have romantic subplots, but the romance isn’t the central focus of the story. It’s part of the character’s journey.
That just brings us back around to those terms I don’t like. I don’t use “women’s fiction” and YA Romance is a more specific genre, and I wouldn’t say readers expect an HEA as much with YA as with adult romance. It’s probably a whole other discussion. 😃
I also reject the expectation that all romantic stories should have happy endings and I absolutely despise the term “women’s fiction”. I’m more likely to consider something to be “literary fiction” if it has a more serious tone or “contemporary” if it’s a bit more casual (not necessarily lighter). Genres are strange, constantly overlapping things.
However, I do acknowledge happy endings are sort of a “rule” within Romance as a genre. I think that predictability is why I rarely read Romance (genre) novels.
I talked about this more in my own post but I think what makes things confusing these days is that romance, as a subplot, gets thrown into pretty much everything (whether it’s necessary or not) and a lot of these non-romance romances get the happily ever after or “disney-treatment” even when a different outcome might seem more realistic for the story or character’s arc.
I completely agree with your definition of the genre terms: “literary fiction” is for more serious material and “contemporary” is for more casual. But yes, they constantly overlap, which is I guess what I find so frustrating when others say there is a hard-fast rule. It’s so limiting. You’re a perfect example of why I think that idea hurts the Romance genre. So many readers don’t want to venture into Romance because it seems too predictable. There are those rule-breaker books out there, but they’re just not usually well-received. I also agree that often romance is thrown into a book that doesn’t need it and doesn’t necessarily make sense for the character. I’m sure it’s a struggle between many authors and publishers. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
Great discussion post topic, Dedra. I think I’m with Deanna and Sam on this. If it’s a book that’s categorised in the romance genre then one of the rules of the genre is that it has a happy ending. I’ve never and probably would never pick up a romance and expect it to not have a HEA/HFN ending and I think I would even be disappointed if it didn’t have one! Like they said, a book can be a love story or have a romance subplot but then I would consider it fiction with romance but not a book of the romance genre. I do agree that not all romances/relationships have happy endings but then I still don’t think it’d be a romance genre novel (I’ve read Love Story and didn’t consider that a romance but I do have a feeling that I marked it as ‘romance’ on GR because it has romance in it 😂).
In my discussion post I used the example of a mystery—I wouldn’t pick up a mystery/thriller and not expect the mystery to be solved at the end, so I wouldn’t pick up a romance (categorised in the genre) and not expect it to have a HEA/HFN ending. If that makes sense! 😊
Who makes these “rules” you speak of?? 😂 I know it’s an assumed rule, but I think it’s one readers and publishers have created, not anything official. I like what Shannon said above: If the focus of a book is romance, it’s a romance. No matter the ending. BUT I’ll say it again, I understand why others disagree. And I don’t think comparing Romance to Mystery or Horror works either, because it works the same way for me. If a book just has small mystery or horror elements, I won’t label it a Mystery or Horror, and the same goes for romance. I guess it’s about quantity for me instead of outcomes. If a book had an unsolved mystery at the end, but the mystery was the focus of the book, I’d still label it a mystery. I probably wouldn’t like the book, but it wouldn’t change the label for me. 🤷♀️ I know my way of thinking is different, and I’m okay with that, but it has helped to hear why others feel the way they do. I will definitely think twice when I categorize books now. Haha! Thank you for commenting!
Ooh this is an interesting topic and I’ve been thinking quite a bit about this ever since the debate sparked on Twitter and resurfaces every now and then. Every time I see arguments for both sides which further makes me question what I think a romance.
Honestly, I fall a little in the middle of both. While I do accept that any book that is MAINLY FOCUSED on romance but doesn’t end with a HEA is still romance, I would still rather it not be labelled romance because when I pick up “romance books”, I want it to end with a HEA. There is a certain expectation with picking up romance books because most of us do it for comfort, escape, and hope. Categorizing a book without HEA as romance would just devastage everybody (including me).I don’t care if the books are highly unrealistic, I want the hope that things will work out and people will get their happily-for-now endings at least.
In the end, semantics don’t matter when it comes to marketing. A book may technically be romance but shouldn’t be categorized as such because of the ending. I’d rather it be categorized as fiction, not “women’s fiction” (I find the concept of women’s fiction unappealing because why do we not have men’s fiction????). It’s not a rule set in stone but it is something that is developed overtime through marketing, expectations, and familiarity.
I hear what you’re saying! In my perfect world, there would be sub categories within the Romance genre that everyone agreed on, because the label of Romance is so broad to me. Romance could encompass everything within the genre and then there would be sub-genres for books with HEAs and another sub-genre for books that fell outside of the formulaic romance books. I know most readers want that guaranteed happy ending, but there are a few of us that like to be surprised sometimes. 😉 And I don’t like the term “women’s fiction” either. That’s a label that needs to disappear for sure! Thank you for sharing your thoughts! I’ve had fun with this topic!
Okay so I am newer to the romance genre so I don’t know if my opinion necessarily has a lot of weight to it but, I kind of like knowing there will be a HEA or HFN. I primarily read gritty and quite frankly soul-rending sci-fi and fantasy books, and I’ve found comfort in picking up a romance palate cleanse to feel something again.
I’m adamant against spoilers too but don’t really see HEA/HFN as one in large part because so much of what I enjoy about the romance genre is the journey along the way, if that makes sense? Most romance books tend to follow the same formula anyways, so you KNOW there will be a third-act break and then a reconciliation… it’s just what I expect. I still remember watching what I thought was a rom-com on Netflix and it was FOR SURELY NOT BECAUSE THE LOVE INTEREST DIES AT THE END and I am still so angry about it lmao.
I totally get wanting the predictability at times, but I just wish we had a different label for those kinds of romances. To me, Romance is an umbrella label and there are sub-genres of romance under that umbrella, if that makes sense.
I probably know the rom-com you’re talking about because the same thing happened to me! Haha! But while I was mad, I still thought of it as a Romance. Just not one with an HEA. I know this is a discussion that readers will probably never be able to agree on, but it’s been illuminating getting everyone’s opinions. Thank you for sharing yours, Kal!
Wow! This is a fascinating discussion. I have loved reading the original post and all of the replies. My take is that a book doesn’t have to have a happy ever after to be a romance. If the story is primarily a love story, then surely that has to be a romance. In life, romances don’t always end happily after all but they are still romances when they happen. One of my favourite romances last year had quite an open ending which was really satisfying. I don’t see how anyone can really lay down rules and say that a love story can’t be classed as a romance if it doesn’t have a happy ending. The whole idea of classing those books as ‘Women’s Fiction’ seems really wrong to me. I’m sure that this discussion is going to continue 😃
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts! I haven’t had many to agree with me and knowing there are a few out there makes me feel less alone. 😂 I 100% agree with you. And yes, it’s a discussion that will probably never have agreement. Haha!
What a great discussion, Dedra. I have to say that in my opinion a book labeled romance needs to have a HEA. I agree with what Deanna said above, if it does not end happily then it should be identified as something else. I often read books and tag them or comment that they are “Women’s Fiction” with a romance element or “Romantic Suspense” etc. Lot’s of interesting thought here. I think labeling a book a specific genre can cause people to reduce their rating if they are taken unaware. Lots of thoughts on this one from different people because us readers, all have different ideas and look for different things. There will never be agreement on this one.
Thanks Carla! I had no idea the strong feelings readers had about this topic, but it’s been illuminating! 😃 I guess in my mind, Romance is an umbrella genre label with sub-genres underneath that include romances with HEAs and romances without HEAs, but I understand why others disagree. This is definitely a topic that will never have agreement. Thank you for sharing your thoughts! <3