Title: Conditions of a Heart
Author: Bethany Mangle
Genre: Young Adult
Published on: February 20, 2024
Publisher: Margaret K. McElderry Books
Source: digital (Books Forward)
Pages: 349
Synopsis:
For fans of Talia Hibbert and Lynn Painter comes a funny and unflinchingly honest story about a teen who must come to terms with her disability and what it means for her identity, her love life, and her future.
Brynn Kwan is desperate for her high school persona to be real. That Brynn is head of the yearbook committee, the favorite for prom queen, and definitely not crumbling from a secret disability that’s rapidly wearing her down. If no one knows the truth about her condition, Brynn doesn’t have to worry about the pitying looks or accusations of being a faker that already destroyed her childhood friendships. She’s even willing to let go of her four-year relationship with her first love, Oliver, rather than reveal that a necessary surgery was the reason she ignored his existence for the entire summer.
But after Brynn tries to break up a fight at a pep rally and winds up barred from all her clubs and senior prom, she has nothing left to prop up her illusion of being just like everyone else. During a week-long suspension from school, she realizes that she doesn’t quite recognize the face in the mirror—and it’s not because of her black eye from the fight. With a healthy sister who simply doesn’t understand and a confused ex-boyfriend who won’t just take a hint and go away like a normal human being, Brynn begins to wonder if it’s possible to reinvent her world by being the person she thought no one wanted: herself.
My thoughts
(Spoiler free)
Conditions of a Heart by Bethany Mangle is not only a story about living with a chronic illness, it’s also a story about accepting and loving yourself and your family. Beautifully written, the author’s own experience growing up with a disability reverberated throughout the pages.
Brynn Kwan wants nothing more than to be ordinary. She desperately wants to be like her peers, a regular teenage girl. But Brynn inherited Ehlers-Danlos syndrome and POTS from her father, conditions she’s been hiding since she moved to a new school after being bullied for her disability when she was younger.
At the start of her senior year in high school, she can see the finish line, but when she steps in to stop a fight at school, the world she’s created begins to crumble around her.
I couldn’t help but feel for Brynn, that life has dealt her such an unfair twist, and then punched her when she was already down. The range of emotions and reactions Brynn goes through in the book because of her condition and because of how she is unfairly treated felt authentic, a result of Mangle’s own familiarity.
Reading Brynn’s journey from the lowest of lows to find her inner strength was a rewarding reminder to look at those around us with more patience and understanding because we truly don’t know what everyone else may be going through.
I did this to myself, and the thing that no one ever tells you about digging your own grave is that you’re never meant to climb back out.
Bethany Mangle; Conditions of a Heart
Not only is Brynn an enigmatic character, but so are all the side characters. Especially Brynn’s father who is living with the same condition, and Brynn’s mother and sister on the opposite side, loving people living with EDS. Mangle succeeded in showing that each side has its own set of struggles, heartbreaks, and triumphs.
Mangle also gives the reader some romance. It never felt like it was added in, it felt organic to the story. Not only has Brynn been hiding her disability from her peers, but from her long-term boyfriend Oliver, as well. When it became impossible to hide, she broke up with him, fearing he would only pity her. The romance isn’t the entire focus of the book, but I appreciated what it added to the story. And even though we don’t spend a ton of time with Oliver, he still leaves quite an impression.
Conditions of a Heart has it all: authentic characters, well-timed humor, and an irresistible emotional pull. I highly recommend this one and look forward to more from Bethany Mangle!
Thank you to Books Forward for providing me with an advance copy.
(All quotes are taken from the advance copy and are subject to change in final print.)
My Rating:
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About the Author
Bethany Mangle is the author of the young adult contemporary novels PREPPED and ALL THE RIGHT REASONS. Her third book, CONDITIONS OF A HEART, is forthcoming in February 2024. When she isn’t writing, she enjoys spoiling her dog, playing video games, and spending time with her unbearably nerdy husband. She moves too much to put a location in her bio ever again.
A Song For A Book
In Conditions of a Heart Brynn is hiding so much and it led me to the song “Hiding My Heart” by Adele, an emotional song that matches the depth of emotions in the book.
…I wish I could lay down beside you when the day is done
And wake up to your face against the mornin’ sun
But like everything I’ve ever known, you’ll disappear one day
So I’ll spend my whole life hidin’ my heart away
Away, yeah
Woke up feeling heavy hearted
I’m going back to where I started
The morning rain, the mornin’ rain
And though I wish that you were here
On that same old road that brought me here
It’s calling me home, it’s calling me home
I wish I could lay down beside you when the day is done
And wake up to your face against the morning sun
But like everything I’ve ever known, you’ll disappear one day
So I’ll spend my whole life hidin’ my heart away
Have you read Conditions of a Heart? Or did you add it to your tbr? Let me know in the comments!
Happy Wandering!
This sounds like quite a different sort of book from Mangle and a personal one as well which she did a wonderful job with.
The story sounds as beautiful as that cover! Another one for my TBR list. 😀